December 22, 2009

Christmas


Well, are you ready for the big day???
Every year I hope that I will be able to enjoy this time of year and relax, every year I end up a hurried stressed mess by the time the day is here.I always realize later after the fact, hey you know I really didnt have to worry so much, everything turned out okay, I didnt have to be as stressed as I was. However, every year knowing this does not change one bit of what I feel and go through to trying to get ready for the big day.
So, the craziness continues as it does every year. My husband absolutely loves this time of year, he cant wait for it. I dread this time of year. It is always hard on me. So much stress worry over making the presents work. Worry , worry, worry. Of course I take all that on me, and matt can just let it roll right off his back and enjoy the season as he did as a kid. Me not so much.
I remember loving this time of year growing up. I would wait and wait and it seemed it took forever for the big day to come. Now I am so worried I am not going to have enough time to make everything work before the big day arrives.
What is Christmas about really? Well, for us its celebrating the birth of Jesus. If I could do so without disappointments and hurt feelings I woudlnt even do gifts. I feel the this time of year gets enveloped into a commercialized frenzy that in no way reflects what we should be doing this time of year. Just worshiping and being in awe of the fact that God sent this baby to us that would grow up and make a way for us to come to God through His sacrifice. I just wish we could focus on that, but I never can not at this time of the year at least. I am always running 100 miles a hour. I am lucky to do my bible reading at all much less really reflect on the meaning of the season.
So, even though its hard, I want to try at least to focus on what the real reason for all this is. Jesus!!!

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